Five Months Old!

by Lara on January 9, 2013

Dear Baby G,

Slowly, maybe a little slower than some of your peers, we are getting into a routine.  I haven’t wanted to push you too much because, well, you’re pretty new to the planet.  As much as I love routine, I think you deserve a little time to adjust to life as a human before I press my neurosis upon you.

We’ve come to an understanding, the three of us, that you won’t be sleeping for more than a few hours at a time until you are darn well ready.  I fought you hard for those first few months, because frankly, it shocked the hell out of me.  But there has been a shift.  I realized that while Mommy and Daddy are exhausted, you are thriving.  You are just fine.  You’re just being a baby, which is kind of your job.  And if you taught me anything while you were breech in utero, it’s that I can throw money and experts and techniques at you all I want, but you will do things in your own time.

5months

Every night, Daddy changes you into your PJs, puts you in your sleep sack, and reads you a book.  Then I come in and you nurse, and if we’re lucky, you will sleep for three or four hours in your own room.  After that, kid, it’s a circus.  You’re up every one, maybe two hours.

Usually around  your 5am wakeup, Daddy will bring you to me if you are not already in bed with us. Lately Daddy has been going to sleep in another room around this time  so you and I can have more room in the bed. A man named Sigmund Freud would have a FIELD DAY with this, but I don’t care.  This is our special time.

I nurse you in the dark in hopes that you’ll fall back asleep. You rarely do. Instead you lie next to me and smile and babble and coo, and I can’t help but nuzzle my face into yours and give you butterfly kisses.  Sometimes it moves me to tears.  It moves me to tears because, kid, I haven’t slept more than a few hours at a time since you’ve been born, and if you could make this special time at 6 or even 8 am, that would be really great.

Our faces touching, I whisper “time to go back to sleep,” while simultaneously trying to shove a pacifier at you.  You reject said pacifier by flailing your head from side to side with sealed lips. I give up on the binky and just lie with you next to me until you fall back asleep, by which time I am wide awake.

I drift off to sleep again right as you wake up, usually around 6 or 7am. This is when Daddy gets up for the day so he will come get you while I try to get another hour or two of sleep before he leaves for work.

So that is our little morning ritual.  I believe I once wrote that everything is worse in the dark, but those moments together right before the sun comes up have proven to be the exception.  I actually love our dark mornings.  Maybe it’s because I know the day ahead is always bright.

I love you,

Mama.

{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

Sarah S. January 11, 2013 at 10:21 am
elise January 11, 2013 at 10:56 am

hi g, you cute stubborn little boy!

lara, thanks for showing the reality. id hate to think things were all peachy keen for every mom out there when my own son decides to follow suit in the ways of g. this is gonna be interesting…

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Lara January 11, 2013 at 5:07 pm

Elise, I’m sure your little guy will be an angel! 🙂 Really, G is on the extreme side of normal for this age, as I understand it. I don’t think the longevity of our sleep issues are very common. I don’t mean to scare you 😉

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elise January 13, 2013 at 9:28 am

no no you definitely havent scared me. its actually a relief (sorry to
say).

all i read are posts about what to do – with sleeping, with feeding, with
this with that – and its so overwhelming…im like how do these moms know
all this stuff???? i admittedly havent read any books on the subject, so
its all based on various personal anecdotes and mom blogs ive read, so
maybe thats the issue.

anyway. its refreshing to hear that even if you have read a fair amount of
literature on these things (which it seems like you have), your baby can
still be the exception to the rule.

so, thanks for having a hard(er) time and sharing it with us 😉 ha!

elise

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HEAB January 11, 2013 at 11:02 am

These posts of your always have me giggling and then tearing up the very next sentence. Such a good writer as well as an amazing mom. G, I think that’s one of my favorite photos of you. Too cute…now go get some sleep. All of you!

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Lara January 11, 2013 at 5:07 pm

Thank you, sweet friend!

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HEAB January 11, 2013 at 11:03 am

*post of YOURS

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Jessie January 11, 2013 at 11:10 am

What a big boy!! Sounds like you two have found a good rhythm as parents. You have great perspective as well. It truly does make a difference. I’ll find myself getting frustrated w/Lyric every few months when she changes something about our “normal” routine. Yesterday was a shitty (SHITTY) day bc I let my frustrations get to me but today I woke up, told myself its going to be a great day and so far, I’m right!

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Lara January 11, 2013 at 5:09 pm

I’m sorry you had a bad day! I agree–changing my perspective and expectations has helped A LOT. I still have my moments, but it helps me appreciate the good.

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Stacie @ Snaps and Bits January 11, 2013 at 3:26 pm

Such a cutie! Congrats 🙂

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Lara January 11, 2013 at 5:09 pm

Thank you Stacie!

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Jenn January 13, 2013 at 6:52 am

Your son is gorgeous! 🙂

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Lara January 13, 2013 at 9:32 am

Thank you! Not that I am biased but I agree 😉

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Linsey Pitts January 13, 2013 at 3:11 pm

Very sweet Lara 🙂 You are so right, he is doing what babies do best- create their own path. These sleepless nights shall pass too- and you will honestly forget how BAD they really were. Dont get me wrong, you will remember you had to get up- but it’s those sweet butterfly kisses and those special little moments that will stick in your head far more than the hours of sleep you lost 🙂 Time is going to keep on flying…and yes, 6 months brings even more excitement! Keep enjoying!!

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Andrea@WellnessNotes January 15, 2013 at 3:41 pm

What a beautiful post! I love that you cherish your mornings with G even though I am sure you’ll cherish a little later morning routine just as much! 😉 The kid often wakes up at 5, and I love to cuddle with him and then we read book after book. While I would love for him to get some more sleep, I really love our special time.

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